(This was something I shared for my Facebook community a week or two ago, but I realized it might reach more people who deserve such an apology outside of my normal group of friends.)
(Also, pardon my disproportionate amount of mommy rants on the blog so far versus discussion of other topics. The other topics take me much longer to write about and I have about three drafts in the works that just haven’t been finished yet!)
On this anniversary of Roe v. Wade, I just want to say, now that I’ve had a kid…I get it. Well, a lot more than I used to. Now that I’ve faced the difficulties of parenthood–even in a supportive and what some might call an “ideal” environment–and found myself nearly defeated by those difficulties over and over again, I understand so much more why someone would choose abortion.
I have support in so many forms and there are days I still question what I got myself into with all of this. It’s only *only* because of the amazing support around me that I have been able to answer that question every time with, “I can do this, and my child is worth it.”
I’m so very sorry for all the times we in the pro-life movement have communicated self-righteousness and judgement toward those of you who were scared shitless about the biggest responsibility you would ever face.
I’m so sorry that our attempts to explain why we believe abortion is wrong have so often failed to come with explanations of our belief in a God whose mercy is without limits for anyone.
I’m so sorry for the disproportionate amount of time I spent in my college days fighting a political battle unproductively rather than building relationships and offering support to women in need.
I am still very much pro-life, but I understand much better now why someone might see abortion as the merciful choice and just how complicated making that choice can be. I feel like many of us in the pro-life community have failed so many women and men who just needed to hear “You can do this parenting thing,” “I believe in you,” “I can help you,” instead of seeing a picture of a dead baby on a truck.
Some of the people doing March for Life this week really do care about women, men, and children, and they may or may not effectively communicate that.
Some of the people doing March for Life this week are seeking a self-righteousness to make up for their own misdeeds, and, yes, as someone who’s been on the inside of this circle for a while, some of them really are judgmental and ignorant.
Please pray for mercy and love over all of us.